To Live Your Best Life, Avoid These 3 Poisons
Do you know how to trap a monkey? You take a ripe banana or a fresh yam and you put it under a heavy wooden box or in a pot with only a small slit for an opening.
The monkey will smell the food and approach the box, sticking his paw through the slit. He will grasp the banana, clenching it tight with a balled fist, but when he goes to remove it from underneath the box his fist won’t fit through the hole.
Unwilling to drop his prize to extract his trapped hand, the monkey will remain stuck–a prisoner of his own poisonous greed.
Tibetans believed the circle of life contained three poisons: greed, anger, and ignorance. Avoiding these traits will lead to a better life.
Greed
In the middle ages it was known as avarice–intense insatiable desire for wealth or selfish gain. It’s what turned American Psycho’s Patrick Bateman into a business card-hating serial killer.
It made Shakespeare’s Malcolm in Macbeth say this:
“With this there grows / In my most ill-composed affection such / A stanch-less avarice that, were I king, / I should cut off the nobles for their lands, / Desire his jewels and this other’s house: / And my more-having would be as a sauce / To make me hunger more.”
What is so bad about greed is that it erodes our empathy for other people.
Communities thrive on compassion and a generosity of spirit.
Selfishness is greed’s fuel. It’ll eventually turn brown nosers into backstabbers. And the more it gets–the more it wants.
Dr. Luke in the Bible warned, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”
Look at what greed has done for the people in jail who were caught running Ponzi schemes. Or the fraudulent crimes committed by some of Wall Street’s biggest brokerage firms.
When Wall Street movie character Gordon Gecko declared, “Greed, for lack of a better word, is good” he birthed a generation of future real-life imitators who neglected to realize that he was the villain.
Even Michael Douglas, the actor who played the character, was a little perplexed at his championing.
If you view the world as interconnected, you see greed for the zero-sum game that it is. As one person takes, their gain is negated by another person’s loss.
The antidote for greed is giving. Giving your time, energy, and resources to pour into others for their benefit is the best way to stay balanced.
Anger
Anger is known as a secondary emotion. It is the byproduct of some deeper feeling. Usually at the root of anger is fear or some type of pain from an earlier experience. When pain mixes with guilt from the past it becomes a powerful and very bitter cocktail.
The Greeks believed anger to be the strongest of all passions–even surpassing love. Living with anger causes us to go through life wearing an emotional mask. Even when the anger isn’t being expressed, our true angry self is always there under the surface.
Star Wars actually has some wise words about anger:
“Fear is the path to the dark side…fear leads to anger…anger leads to hate…hate leads to suffering.” — Yoda
You could substitute the words jealousy, abuse, or judgement for “fear” in the quote and the same truth about anger’s progression applies.
If you are someone who gets angry a lot, stop to think about the root cause of your anger. If you can do some introspection and identify the cause of your anger, the process of stopping the cycle at the source can begin.
The antidote for anger is compassion and kindness. Try having compassion for people who don’t even deserve it. Being compassionate and kind does not make you weak, but being angry all the time will make you do stupid things.
Ignorance
This one is tricky because ignorance by its nature implies a blind spot in someone’s character. Another way of looking at this poison would be delusion.
Delusion is thinking you are more important than you are. It is thinking you are untouchable–or believing that something wrong is right.
Another type of ignorance is deliberate ignorance–a form of apathy. This is when the answer is readily available–even free, yet we choose to not pursue it.
Do you know where the term “Ignorance is bliss” comes from? An English poet named Thomas Gray who wrote in the 1700’s. He was an extremely self-critical writer who only published 13 poems in his lifetime.
Thomas Gray had talent. One of his works is even considered by some scholars to be a masterpiece. Yet, the fact so few people have even heard of him probably has something to do with his self-defeating attitude. Deliberate ignorance.
The best way to avoid ignorance is to invite accountability into your life. Friends whom you trust to always tell you the truth in love will be your greatest defense against delusional thoughts and feelings.
Everyone has something they are ignorant about.
As I write this I’m sure there are deficiencies that I’m neglecting. Living with accountability partners isn’t just for people recovering from substance abuse. It is a great habit for healthy people who want to remain on track.
The antidote to ignorance is knowledge and a curiosity beyond what you already find familiar. Getting to know people of different backgrounds, cultures, means, and beliefs will open your eyes to new perspectives. You will start to feel more comfortable in any group or environment because you will see diversity as an opportunity to learn and grow.
Since the middle ages, people have recognized the term poison for a potion or substance that was potentially deadly because it had the power to corrode, destroy, pollute, or permanently alter something.
Greed, anger, and ignorance are poisonous. Ancient wisdom recognized this and so should we. The scary thing about poison is that you can ingest it without even realizing it. A small dose here and there may not be enough to destroy us, but if we consistently indulge in anger, ignorance, and greed–they will bring us down–just as potently as arsenic or snake venom.
Stay away from poisonous thinking, and keep the antidotes in full supply.
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